Believe

As we begin the new, . . .  reluctant and nervous. . . we are given opportunity to rely more on God, to learn more truth, and to build our faith.  The unknown is often scary and can cause some anxiety.  My flesh cries out, "I hate this!" . . ."How are we going to pay for this new drug?!" . . . "is this one going to stop the growth of the tumor?"  . . . It makes me want to crawl under a bed . . . even with the ferocious dust bunnies . . . .and remain in the fetal position! . . .

But still the gentle spirit woos . . . inviting me to just rest in his arms.  The arms that never grow tired. . . never let go. . . or never stop loving. 

 He holds us and says, "Do not fear, I have your hand, I will help you. . . Be still and rest. . . The birds do not store up food or worry about what they'll eat each day. . . Are you not much more valuable to me than them? . . .I Got this."

He asks if I believe He is able and I shout YES I believe! Without belief I can't have faith. He wants to help strengthen my faith but I have to choose "belief" and get rid of unbelief. . . believing lies clogs up the working of my faith. . . I can't see the miraculous things happening all around me if I continue believing lies. . .  so I continue to bury myself in His truth.  His Love is indescribable . . . Agape. . . the second unbelief starts to stir . . .He's there showing me . . . reminding me to believe truth. . .  .

sometimes through covenant sisters. . . 

probably not even knowing the shirt she chose to wear was in fact. . . Not chosen by her.

I never thought administering chemo would be part of my job title. . . especially not to one of my children.  But as any new hill is to climb. . . looking up is often one of the scariest parts. . . steep. . . can't see the end. . . But,  I can't see the beauty from the top if I don't choose to climb. . . knowing there will be loving hands waiting behind me to catch me when I fall.

She senses when I'm feeling timid. . . Kissing my face she reminds me again that fear is NOT from the Lord and we have to journey onward. . . protection from the toxic poison . . . we press on!

She receives it well and it appears to have no harsh side effects. 

As we enter into week 3 we'll see if Elaina is the "normal" . . . Praying she continues to be ALL unique . . . . Not the normal. . . b/c those ones have blood counts that decide to take a dive during week three. 

RESTORATION. . . our Home's declaration. . .

 Praising Jehovah Rapha for the restoring that has already taken place and the rest that is yet to come.