His Leading

I desire to be a woman of faith… but am aware that having a steadfast faith in God doesn't guarantee life will be easy and pain free.  I may never see the purpose of my trials in life while I'm here, but I believe God is a promise keeper and that He will never leave me.  And because He is all knowing, I can trust He is leading me along teaching me all about becoming a princess of faith.  Elaina is doing perfect through her treatments.  She has had just a few days being slightly more tired than usual and did complain once of a sore throat both of these being mild side effects of treatment but we are trusting God is protecting her while destroying this destructive tumor.  

I've been blessed this week learning about Jesus and his obedience to the father as I continue a daily study to Walk as Jesus Walked.  I long to be more like Him. . . It requires risk and is definitely a costly adventure.  But as I continue to trudge along, I am learning that to be more like someone I must spend a lot of time with them.  I have used the excuse many times, "I'm so busy". . . It's almost as if our culture/the world sees "busyness" as success. I hear all the time and have even said it myself, "I don't see how they do all they do, they are amazing." I feel this is a lie the enemy wants us to believe. . . that you are more successful with the "more" you get done in your day. . . because if we are SO busy. . . it's easier to forget to spend time with the Father, OR we are just too tired to spend the time. . .  .I've given God many excuses. . . but He knows my heart. It all boils down to the fact that I didn't make the priority to stop my busyness. I want to vow to not be too busy for Him.  At the end of the day. . . nothing really matters if I chose to ignore my maker.  I could have gotten two lists of "To-Do's" checked off but if I didn't stop and check in with God to see what He would desire for my day than . . . Well, it would be just an ordinary day I guess.

These past two weeks have been beyond overwhelming and "BUSY" for me.  They were filled with reminders of more forgotten "to-do's" . . . . NO JOKE, everywhere I turned I would be getting a message via text, email, FB, etc reminding me of a deadline or something that person wanted me to do.  I'd about reached my breaking point multiple times.  The only thing that saved me had to be prayer.  God is full of grace and as I prayed . . . OK, more like fussed and complained to God about my "being so behind" after treatment ran over by about 40 minutes two days in a row. . .  I instantly remembered the person I met that day during Elaina's treatment. . . The person I probably would NOT have met had everything been "on schedule". .  . If I wouldn't have met this precious couple than I wouldn't have had the blessing of entering into the spiritual conversation that we shared.  God showed up and it was awesome! The point is, as much as I would like to think I know best. . .I do NOT know what is best for me apart from God and being busy in my own self-centered life is not His plan for me.  I have seen some wonderful things while at the treatment center and I sense God is up to something there. .. .  J.J and I both have been able to talk multiple times with different people about our journey and many people have come up to us telling us the joy Elaina brought to their day.  God is good and He has a plan far bigger than I can know.  I want to be a good student… like Jesus I want to seek to please the Father…
I want to willingly enter into Gods Kingdom agenda and fulfill my role in His grand story… but obedience is required… I am still learning what that looks like.
I am also thankful for new mornings.. . .
This morning as I drove up to drop some work off I noticed a board set up outside the main doors that read. . .
For I hold you by your right hand—
    I, the Lord your God.
And I say to you,
    ‘Don’t be afraid. I am here to help you.
I wasn't afraid this morning but I was needing to be refreshed of the valuable lesson God had been trying to teach me just days before.  That I am NOT alone and He is here to Help. . . holding my hand.  I am also thankful for "Secret Angels" that drop surprises off on my doorstep with sweet reminders that I am "Chosen" Not sure who was responsible for the surprise basket of treasures but I am so thankful and encouraged.  I am also thankful for encouraging messages sent to me during the day reminding me I am loved. There is SO much to be thankful for! I can't possibly list it all . . .  the prayers!. . . the food!. .. . unconditional love. . . the list goes on and on.  I am unworthy of any of this. . . especially after all my crying to God over super silly things. . . Ha! but He loves me no matter what, and He is there catching every tear.    

Winter

We are preparing for uncharted territory. . . something we have never done before. . . and similar to any NEW experience. . .  

Fear can try to stop you from the unknown. But God has not given us the spirit of fear, but of power and of love and of a sound mind. . . . 2 Timothy 1:7

 Spring is just around the corner. This wintery chapter will not be too long.  We know we will make it through this cold… tough... trying season but only by God's grace.

Tuesday the 6th we need your prayers as we officially enter into this new chapter.  Side effects and risks are low (so thankful) and we are hopeful for there to be NONE that will cause problems.

Life will become extremely busy during the next month and a half . . . Monday thru Friday for 5 consecutive weeks Elaina will be treated. I don't know how we will juggle everything but I know the Lord will be walking with us. . . every step of the way.  The boys will come with us each time. .. . Ha! it will definitely keep things interesting. . . Homeschooling will look a little different. . . maybe even more "interesting" there too. . . the rest of my pregnancy will surely FLY by. . . but I know there will be joy mingled in through all this! God is faithful! and that is why we will seek Him. . . He brings rest to our souls and restores our strength.  Matthew 11:28-29. . . "Then Jesus said, “Come to me, all of you who are weary and carry heavy burdens, and I will give you rest.  Take my yoke upon you. Let me teach you, because I am humble and gentle at heart, and you will find rest for your souls."

Please,  don't stop sending encouragement.  I may not have time to reply back to everyone but I do read them all and it helps to keep us going . . . knowing there are so many out there partnering with us.   

Happy New Year!